Experiencing suicidal feelings can be a deeply frightening, isolating, and overwhelming experience. It can make you feel stuck in a dark tunnel with no clear way out. However, suicidal thoughts are far more common than many people realize—especially among men and young guys, who often feel immense pressure to keep their struggles hidden.
Suicidal thoughts do not mean you are weak or that you are a failure. They are a sign that your mind and body are carrying an overwhelming amount of pain, stress, or exhaustion. Whatever you are going through, it is crucial to remember that support is available right here in Reading, and you do not have to carry this alone.
If you are in immediate danger or feel you cannot keep yourself safe right now, please reach out for urgent help immediately:
- Call 999 or go directly to the Royal Berkshire Hospital A&E department.
- Call NHS 111 (Option 2) for 24/7 Berkshire NHS urgent mental health support.
- Call Samaritans free on 116 123 for confidential, round-the-clock listening support.
- Text SHOUT to 85258 for 24/7 text-based crisis support.
Why Might Someone Experience Suicidal Feelings?
Suicidal feelings can affect men from all walks of life, regardless of background, job, or age. There is rarely a single cause; more often, it is a combination of heavy pressures building up over time. Common factors include:
- Life Traumas and Loss: Experiencing a relationship breakdown, bereavement, job loss, or past physical or emotional trauma.
- Mental and Physical Health Challenges: Living with depression, severe anxiety, chronic pain, physical injury, or long-term illness.
- Daily Pressures: Facing financial stress, housing uncertainty, or working in high-stress environment.
- Substance Use: Using alcohol or drugs to numb pain, which can often worsen low mood and impulsivity.
- Medication Side Effects: Starting a new prescription medication can sometimes temporarily increase distress. If you notice a sudden shift in your mood after starting new medication, speak with your local GP.
It is also important to note that suicidal thoughts can hit even when things appear to be going well on the surface. Guys in this situation often feel guilty, telling themselves they “have no right” to feel this way. Pain is not a competition, and you deserve support regardless of your circumstances.
How Suicidal Feelings Affect Your Mind
Suicidal thoughts can build gradually, warping your perspective until ending your life feels like the only viable option to stop the pain. You might find yourself thinking phrases like:
- “I just want this pain or situation to stop.”
- “Everyone in my life would be better off without me.”
- “Nothing is ever going to get better.”
When you are deep in distress, your brain tricks you into believing that your current state is permanent. But ending your life is a permanent response to a temporary state of extreme pain. Feelings fluctuate, situations change, and with the right support, many men who have felt completely hopeless have gone on to build full, meaningful lives.
Practical Steps to Help Yourself Right Now
When suicidal thoughts hit, making decisions feels incredibly difficult. Focusing on small, manageable actions can help you stay safe and regain control in the moment.
Reach Out to People You Trust
Sharing how you feel with a mate, family member, or partner takes away the isolation. You do not need to give a speech or have it all figured out—simply letting someone know you are having a tough time lowers the internal pressure. If talking feels too intense, just being in the same room with someone can be deeply comforting.
Connect with Professional Help
Reaching out to a professional gives you an objective, non-judgmental space to unload.
- Speak with your local Reading GP to discuss mental health support, therapy referrals, or treatment options.
- Contact PAPYRUS HOPELINE247 on 0800 068 4141 (or text 88247) for dedicated young person crisis support.
- Use anonymous online chat platforms like Kooth or Qwell to speak with trained practitioners at your own pace.
Focus on Grounding and Distraction
When emotions feel out of control, bring your mind back to the physical room around you:
- Ground your senses: Try the 5-4-3-2-1 technique (finding 5 things you can see, 4 you can touch, 3 you can hear, 2 you can smell, and 1 you can taste).
- Find a safe space: Go to a room where you feel comfortable, or visit a public space like Reading Central Library or a quiet park if being alone feels unsafe.
- Distract your brain: Watch a comedy, listen to music, go for a run, or work on a hands-on project to give your mind a break from the loop.
Cover Your Basic Physical Needs
Mental distress is magnified when your body is running on empty. Take a step back and check:
- Have you had a glass of water today?
- Have you eaten a proper meal?
- Can you step into a warm shower or take a short nap?
Identify Your Reasons to Keep Going
Remind yourself of what grounds you to this life, no matter how small it might seem:
- People and Pets: A friend, a family member, a partner, or a pet who relies on you.
- Passions and Interests: A local sports team you follow, a hobby you enjoy, or music you love.
- Future Curiosity: A film you want to watch, a trip you want to take, or a skill you want to learn. Write these down on your phone notes so you can refer to them during dark moments.
A Message of Hope: “Keep Reading the Story”
Holding onto curiosity about the future can be a lifeline when hope is hard to find. Consider the perspective of someone who struggled through severe suicidal feelings before coming through the other side:
“Having suicidal feelings is such a dark, bleak way to feel. Your brain overwhelms you, and you feel like this is your only option. When I felt this way, I started viewing my life like a book because I love reading. On my darkest days, I kept telling myself: ‘You can’t just close the book now. What if something really good happens in 100 pages? You have to keep reading the story to see how it ends.’ I used my natural curiosity to convince myself to keep living for just one more day. I am so glad that I did.”
Local Support in Reading
You do not have to carry this weight on your own. Local services in Reading are ready to listen:
- Andy’s Man Club (Reading): A free, peer-to-peer support group for men meeting every Monday at 7 PM. A non-judgmental space to grab a brew and chat with other guys who get it.
- No5 Young People’s Counselling: Free, confidential counselling for ages 11–25 across Berkshire.
- Berkshire West Breathing Space: Safe out-of-hours support for adults in distress (0800 002 9091).
- CALM (Campaign Against Living Miserably): Helpline tailored specifically for men (0800 58 58 58, open 5 PM to midnight daily).
Take it one day, one hour, or one minute at a time. Reach out for support today—your story is not over yet.